WHAT, ME WORRY?

“What, me worry?” said Alfred E. Neuman, the mascot and cover boy of Mad magazine. And that is my normal response to those who e-mail me to ask me about my stand on the Allah word controversy.

These people who email me to ask me about my stand on the Allah word controversy are puzzled as to my lack of stand. Normally I always have an opinion about everything but this time I appear deafeningly silent. And this irks them somewhat.

Why must I have a stand? Can’t I not have any stand? Does not having a stand mean I support what the Muslims are demanding? Or do you think it means I support what the Christians are demanding?

Maybe it is better I do not state my stand because if I do state my stand you may not like what I have to say.

You feel I should state my stand one way or another. And my stand should either be I agree with the Christians or I agree with the Muslims. And since I keep silent then the Muslims will see this as I support the Christians while the Christians will see this as I support the Muslims.

This is the same as my stand regarding politics. When I do not support Pakatan Rakyat, the Pakatan Rakyat people perceive that I am pro-Barisan Nasional. But since I do not support Barisan Nasional either, the Barisan Nasional people perceive that I am pro-Pakatan Rakyat. And when I say I am political but non-partisan they scramble to look for a dictionary to find out what that means and still can’t figure out what it means.

Okay, you insist I state my stand then let me state my stand. I think both Muslims and Christians should be dragged outside and shot. For more than 1,000 years the Muslims and Christians have been at each other’s throats and have brought untold misery to the world. And they hide behind God’s name in perpetuating the work of the devil.

I have been monitoring the comments on the Internet and I find that those who talk the most are actually neither Christian nor Muslim. Why are these people getting involved? Why are they so upset? Is it their problem?

These people do not even accept Allah as their God. They pray to ancestors, statues, trees, the moon, the sun, etc. Hell, many do not even believe in God and think that all religions are nonsense. They mock those who have a religion and who believe in God. Yet they are so kaypoh about whether the Christians can or cannot use Allah as the name of God.

Is this about human rights and justice? If you believe that then you can also believe that your mother is still a virgin. This is not about human rights or justice. This is about cari peluang to whack the Malays, Muslims and Islam. This is your chance to jump onto the bandwagon and lepas geram against the Malays.

There is absolutely no sincerity on the part of those who are defending the rights of the Christians to use the Allah word. Some even said they are not Christians but they were going to go to church last Sunday to join the protest.

Okay, are you going to go to the mosque today (Friday) to defend the rights of the Muslims to follow the Shia faith? Are you going to protest the fact that Malays cannot become Shias? And why not? Since this is about rights and justice should you not all assemble in front of the National Mosque after Friday prayers today and demand that the government allow Malays to follow the Shia faith?

Of course you are not going to do that. You do not care a damn about the Muslims. In fact, some of you have even commented that it is better that the Sunnis and Shias go and kill each other. Less Muslims in the world means the better for the world.

What you want is to see a fight. You want the Muslims and Christians to fight each other. And many of you who want this are neither Muslim nor Christian.

You feel that if this issue blows up beyond control then the Christians in Sabah and Sarawak might abandon Barisan Nasional and in the next election will vote for Pakatan Rakyat. That is what you really want to see.

Even DAP has jumped onto the bandwagon. This is not about rights and justice. This is about politics and an attempt to swing the Christians in Sabah and Sarawak over to Pakatan Rakyat.

DAP claims to be a secular party. They do not want a theological state, Islamic State or whatever. But they are playing the religion card as much as Umno is. You fight for secularism and at the same time you fight for Christianity. Are we going to see DAP fight for Shia Islam next? Or is DAP going to abstain from that fight and not get involved?

Religious bigots and fanatics are a threat to world peace. But the bigger threat comes from those who do not even subscribe to those religions but who are exploiting this issue for political gain. These people are the batu api. These people are helping to pour fuel onto the fire.

They do not really care whether Christians can or cannot use Allah. They do not even believe in Allah. They believe that Allah is a fairy tale. But it is a good issue to exploit to make the Christians angry so that they vote opposition come the next election. And Umno, too, will exploit this issue to try to get more Malays to vote government come the next election.

Hence my stand is very clear. Shoot them all. But first shoot the batu api who are neither Muslim nor Christian. These are the more dangerous people that we need to exterminate like rats and cockroaches.